


Harmonious Discord

by MsThunderFrost



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Implied Past Non-Con, M/M, Sibling Incest, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-23
Updated: 2013-10-23
Packaged: 2017-12-30 07:16:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1015702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MsThunderFrost/pseuds/MsThunderFrost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki is being abused in an Asgardian jail, and after seven months of torture, he can't take it anymore. Can Thor save him?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Harmonious Discord

If he recalled correctly, it had been seven months since the unlikely team of baboons (Avengers, they liked to call themselves) had foiled his plot to take control of the earth and he had been sentenced to five years in an Asguardian detention facility.

It wouldn't have been so bad, had it not been for the look of absolute betrayal in Thor's eyes as he was forced down on his knees before Odin's throne. He didn't know why it hurt, only that it did, and it was enough to silence any quick-witted remark that burned the tip of his tongue throughout the trial. Thor had been silent as well. Silent as he watched Odin stitch Loki's mouth closed. Silent as he watched the blood trickle down his brother's face. Silent as he watched Loki cry in agony.

He was silent because now, after all this time, he had come to accept that Loki was out of his reach. Loki could feel the disconnect between them, and he never realized that the disconnect that he had once craved would hurt him so badly. The throbbing ache of his face was nothing compared to the dagger twisting in his heart, and even when Odin recited the powerful incantation to remove the magic that flowed through his veins, all he could feel was that all-powerful numbness.

Now, Loki sat in the confines of his cell, weakened from the sheer amount of energy it took to heal his facial wounds without magic. It had never occurred to him how much the face could bleed when injured. Dried blood stained his chin, his neck, and the collar of his old, green shirt. He had been wearing it, or something similar to it, since the day he arrived. Odin didn't exactly allow him to pack all of the 'comforts' of home before he shipped him off to his new home, mind you.

He was sitting, waiting, hoping that the impossible would happen and Thor would visit him – but more so, hoping that Thor would care. Deep within his blackened heart, that was all that Loki craved. The acceptance and love of his brother. And he had never had it. No matter what came out of Thor's mouth, Loki knew his brother. He could see past the mask that his brother projected. He was a disgrace to the family name, the betrayer of Asguard, and Thor couldn't wait for the day when he'd rot in that cell…

The door to his cell rattled. Loki didn't even bother to look up. Most likely, it was one of the other inmates, and he had learned very quickly what they were really after… "You have a visitor." An old man croaked from the other side of the door.

"I told you that I've no need for visitors." He spit the word out as if it were vile. "Why can't you just let me rot in peace?"

"I'm sure that if that were father's intention, he would've found a more suitable punishment." An all-too-familiar voice rattled off in a most matter-of-fact manner.

Loki swallowed down the would-be tremor in his voice. "I thought I made it clear – I haven't the time or need for visitors."

Thor shrugged. "You have all the time in the world, dear brother. You've served a mere two-hundred ten days of your one-thousand six-hundred fifteen. Besides, you seem rather lonely."

"And you're here to fill the void?" Loki asked skeptically. He laughed a dry, broken laugh.

"I'm here to attempt it, yes." Thor confirmed, his voice serious.

Loki waved off the guard, leveling Thor with a look that almost dared him to step foot inside of his own personal hell. Thor accepted that dare silently. He was just as silent, if not more so, than the day of the trial. And that look had returned to his face. It was a look of grim determination, but also pity and sadness. He couldn't believe what Loki had fallen to. Stepping inside of the cell, the door rattled closed behind him. He took a seat on the bench across from Loki, who was sprawled on the floor.

Thor allowed himself a quick glance at Loki's broken body, but once his eyes met with the gruesome sight, he found that he couldn't look away. Loki's face was still mutilated from his first failed punishment. Even without his silver tongue, he could still make magic bend to his whim and thus, he was still dangerous. His body was also disfigured. Scratches marred the perfect ivory of his chest and there was thick, dried blood on his thighs. Thor didn't even want to think…

"Don't stare at me." Loki commanded, his voice hoarse. "I don't need your pity. You think this is bad?" He laughed brokenly, wincing as blood ran fresh from his pierced lips. "I've survived worse. I will survive this."

Thor motioned blindly to Loki's blood-soaked thighs. "Have those brutes…"

Loki brought his legs into his chest, gingerly nursing what looked to be a dislocated knee. "I thought I said not to stare?"

Thor clenched his hand into a fist. "This… This is not what father wanted for you, Loki! He didn't want you to be…" Thor swallowed hard, missing the way Loki looked away. "Your beautiful body, Loki…"

Loki felt tears bristle at his eyes, misreading what it was that Thor was attempting to say. His brother, his lover, found him hideous. He couldn't help what those brutes did to him! "I know. It's hideous. You needn't remind me."

Thor didn't hear him. "What are their names, Loki? What are the names of the brutes that did this to you?"

Loki shot him a look. "I have nothing to say."

Loki's hands trembled as the familiar burning aches attacked his mouth. Thor was telling him lies. It was always lies. Now, he knew what it felt to be on the other end of the trick. Thor continued to spout on and on about the Allfather, their father, and how much he cared for Loki. He tried to make it seem as if the Allfather would actually care if he lived or died. Loki had never heard a more sick joke. And what made it even worse? Loki actually wanted to believe him.

Finally, Thor broke away from his tangent. "Why are you sitting on the floor, Loki?"

Loki wouldn't mention the dislocated knee or the broken ankle. "It doesn't matter. What did you come here for, Thor?"

Thor reached behind him and pulled out a bundle of clothing. "I've come to bring you a fresh set of clothes. It has been brought to my attention that… you've been without as of late."

Loki frowned. "I don't need your charity."

"It isn't charity, Loki. It's called unconditional love." Thor tossed the clothing to Loki. "Can't have you getting an infection, now."

"I'm still a god. I don't get infections." Loki replied haughtily.

"Yes, but gods also don't dislocate bones or fracture their ankles. You could do to be careful – just in case."

Thor stood up and made his way to the bench, rattling the door once to signal that he was ready to leave. Loki lolled his head toward him, not wanting to speak, but knowing he had to. "Are you going to come back?"

The door slid open and Thor walked out, allowing the old man to slide the door closed behind him. He turned back, offering his brother a casual look. "Maybe." He said. He walked away after that, and Loki was left alone.

OOOO

Loki stared at the woman seated opposite him. "You claim that Odin sent you?"

"No." The woman said blandly. The medical symbol on her hat clearly showed her to be a nurse. "I was sent by your brother, Master Thor. Now, be still while I examine you."

Loki obeyed, but only because he didn't have the energy to go against her orders. It had been two weeks since Thor had been in to see him; that was, two weeks by Loki's calculation. In his little cell, there were no windows. He didn't have any access to the outside world, lest he somehow hurt someone. He could only silently count down the hours within his own mind, slowly plunging further into the so-called 'madness' that Odin had diagnosed him with.

Her cold hands touched his skin in a borderline intimate manner, quickly becoming slick with his blood. Gently, she attempted to pry his legs apart to see the cause of the wound. Loki refused. A low growl echoed from the back of his throat as he forced his knees together with a hard knock, causing further damage to the already swollen body part. The nurse shook her head disapprovingly, but didn't say a word about it. It wasn't her place.

"You have a dislocated knee, a fractured ankle, two cracked ribs, an unidentified source of bleeding on your lower torso, and an infection brewing in your facial wound. Take this," she handed him a vial of off-white liquid, "and all will be well."

"And what if I say no?" Loki said teasingly, but his eyes revealed his seriousness.

"The infection is foul, sir. And there is no way to tell if it would stay in the face or not. If it spreads throughout the body, it could be potentially fatal." The nurse warned, her hands interlocked neatly in front of her.

"And what if I want to die?" Loki asked, all humor gone from his voice.

The nurse continued to stare at him with her level stare. "That is your choice, sir."

Loki offered her a pitiful smile. "No, it's not my choice. It's never been my choice, has it? If I tell you no, I'd rather die, then you'll say that it is my choice now. But once you leave, you'll run to brother and tell him."

The nurse said nothing, only lowered her gaze awkwardly to the floor. That said more than words ever could. "Like I said, it was never my choice." Loki set the vial down. "I didn't choose to be born a monster. I simply was. Can you fault me that?"

"I find no fault with you, sir." The nurse forced out weakly.

Loki didn't even bother to look at her. "That's what they all say."

I find no fault with you, Loki. You are still my brother, and this is not the punishment which I would have chosen. Thor's last words before he was thrown into his cell rang loud and clear in his head – that had been the only time that he had broken the silence, and even then, Loki had barely heard him. Loki had, foolishly, believed him. He had believed his brother found him innocent. He had found himself, like all of those meaningless humans, believing in Thor.

Loki had been Thor's first. Even at just barely eighteen-years-old, Loki knew that he was destined to be Thor's. He would take Thor in whatever way that Thor offered himself, and when he offered himself as a lover… well, Loki would have been a fool not to accept. But he had been blind. He had been blind to the way that the humans were slowly worming their way into his lover's heart, especially that unfavorable human by the name of Jane Foster. And by the time he realized it, it was too late.

Loki tossed the vial at the nurse, who caught it with fumbling hands. "You take that back to Thor and his human bitch and tell them thusly: I'd rather die from this festering mess of an infection than suffer a moment of their gratitude."

"If that is what you want, sir." The nurse offered. She was shaking terribly from fear.

"Do I need to make it clearer? What part of my order did you not understand?" Loki spat at her.

"No, I understand." And even if it did overstep her boundaries, she added, "Master Loki? Master Thor has proffered his love for many millennia. He's not the fool for retracting it. You're the fool for never accepting it."

OOOO

"Your human has called me a fool." Loki offered, looking at his former lover with milky eyes. He felt so human, so vulnerable, dying in such a callous way. Dreams of a valiant death in battle were crushed at his feet, but he hadn't the energy to care.

"Jane?" Thor raised an eyebrow, shocked at the notion that Jane could've gotten into the Asguardian detention facility.

"No, the nurse you sent to tend to me." Loki huffed. "I do not need to be cared for, Thor. I'm not a charity project."

"So you continue to say." Thor leaned back on the bench.

"Do you say differently?" There was no answer. "I told her quite clearly that I would rather die here than be back in your hands of 'mercy'. It is not merciful to share a house with that… that scum of a woman. She called me a fool for that."

Thor crossed his arms over his broad chest. "Yes, I can see why that would make you a fool."

"Really?" Loki raised an eyebrow. "Do fill me in, brother. For, I do not understand how mere wounds of the body can hurt more than a permanent scar to the heart. Or, did you forget that I had one? A heart, that is."

Thor leaned forward, tapping his finger against Loki's chest. "Yes, I know that you have one. And I also know that it is breaking. It's breaking into so many pieces, you don't know if you can recover them all."

Loki raised an eyebrow. "You think me a sap, brother?"

Thor shook his head. "Oh, no. Never a sap. You've never been the romantic kind, Loki. But I've known you all my life. And when you're hurt, you mask it with pain. Usually, you inflict that pain onto others. But now, all alone, you inflict it on yourself."

Loki leaned back against the wall, unperturbed. "And what are you planning to do about it?"

"Nothing." Thor said as he rose off of the bench. "You have to see the truth for yourself, otherwise truth is the same as fiction."

The door slid closed with the same rattle, and, like always, Thor waited for that familiar question. Loki would always turn and ask if he would come back, ask for that reformation he couldn't ask for under the scrutiny of the public eye. However, that question never came. Thor turned back, watching as Loki picked at the frayed, bloody straps of shirt that he had left. Thor would have to come back with more clothing, even if Loki didn't want him to come back.

Finally, Loki produced a dagger from the inside of his shirt. He spun it around on his finger for a moment, eyeing the way that it looked in the complete and utter darkness of the cell. He fantasized about the end of it, the end of time, when he wouldn't have to hurt anymore. All he wanted was the blissful moment when he could be back in Thor's arms, if only for a moment longer, and then it would all be over. The insanity would end. The darkness would end.

"If I died, would you miss me?" Loki asked softly. The look of absolute seriousness in Loki's eyes worried Thor.

"Yes. Yes, I would." And then, he walked away.

OOOO

Thor stared from the opposite side of the bars as Loki pressed the dagger to his throat. He had been called down to the prison immediately when it was discovered that Loki had intent to commit suicide. Upon arrival, it was also discovered that Loki had the keys to his cell. He had no intention of escaping, but more of keeping Thor out of his way. He wanted Thor to have a front-row seat to his demise. He wanted his 'brother' to be forced to watch as he fell.

Thor gripped the handle of the hammer in his hand, waiting to bash it into the bars. Whenever he would raise the hammer into the air, Loki would press the dagger in a bit harder and blood would trickle down his neck. It was a lose-lose situation. By the time that he reached Loki, Loki would be dead and there would be no way to revive him. The only one capable of reviving him would be Odin, and both knew that the Allfather would do no such thing.

"Why are you doing this, Loki?" Thor screamed, rattling the bars with his raw strength.

"Because I love you." Loki said. "I love you, and even though I try to hate you, I still… love… you."

"And why is that enough to kill yourself? If you love me, that should make you happy."

Loki scoffed. "Happy. Happy? I know not the meaning of the word." He pressed the dagger in a bit further, his words coming out as a wheeze now. "Why can't you just let me end it? I know you want to."

"How could you… How could you say such a thing, brother?" Thor asked brokenly.

"You left me to rot in here! These men have had their way with me and I am worthless! I'm pathetic! And what are you doing while I'm suffering? Screwing some human!"

"I never bedded her, Loki." Thor said gravely.

Loki looked away, ashamed of the tears welling in his eyes. "And you expect me to believe such a poorly constructed lie?"

"I've never lied to you, Loki, and I'm not about to start now. You were the first I bedded and the only I've ever bedded. I made a vow to you that I would marry you when I took the throne and I don't go back on my word, no matter your birthright."

Loki still didn't look convinced. Thor had to prove it to him. But how? And then it occurred to him. Reaching into the back pocket of his breeches, he pulled out the engagement ring that he had once showed to Loki. He had been saving it for Loki's release, as a celebration of sorts, but it seemed like Loki needed it right that moment. He needed reassurance, and Thor couldn't blame him. But he had never thought that Loki would go to such extremes.

"I still have the ring, Loki. I would not bed her without intent to marry, because the Allfather has said it is disgraceful to have a child born out of wedlock ascend to the throne. I couldn't risk it. I didn't want to risk it. I don't love her."

Loki's hand trembled, inadvertently cutting his neck deeper. "Who do you love, then?"

"You."

The key slid under the bars and Thor fumbled with them trying to get inside, get to his lover, as soon as possible. Once he was inside, he fell to his knees beside his brother and wrestled the knife away. Loki crumbled into his embrace, long hair tumbling over his shoulder. He wasn't in any breeches and he was still bleeding rather heavily, supporting his story about the abuse he had endured. Thor would have to deal with that later.

"My beautiful, beautiful brother…" he cooed. "I'm sorry that you've had to endure this. I will go before the Allfather and ask for you conviction to be overturned. I will have you under my personal care, and I will nurse you back to health."

"And what of Jane?" Loki rasped, feeling the pain in his mouth return.

"She will be gone before you come home." Thor assured. "I only ask one thing." Loki looked at him and nodded shortly, feeling pain shoot rapidly over his body. "Would you take this medication for me? Please?"

Thor tilted it to Loki's mouth and, after a moment, he drank. His eyes started to grow heavy. "Thor…"

"Hmm?" Thor asked, laying Loki down softly onto his back.

"Will you still be here… when I wake up?" Loki slurred.

Thor nodded, leaning down and kissing his brother's forehead. He tucked one of the dark hairs away from Loki's face. "Of course, dear brother. I'm not going anywhere."


End file.
